The title’s a little whacky, I get it, but let’s think about it for a second. There are must-do’s to do before moving in with your significant other. In other words, there are conversations to be had, planning to be done, and scenarios to talk about and figure out. And if you don’t have the conversations, plan the plans, and talk the scenarios out, the two of you will likely end up being screwed.
In addition to all of this planning, you need to be sure you’re ready to move in. I mean, even if you’ve been going to her place and she’s been going to yours countless times a week, and even if y’all have sleepovers 90% of the time, you still need to make sure you’re ready to move in with the love of your life (girlfriend at the time).
So, before I tell you what you should do before moving in with her, and I will explicitly tell you, I’m going to forewarn you first: Moving in together can be great for financial status, seeing as you’ll be splitting all the bills. However, it can also be bad in certain situations, and once you do the move, it’s extremely hard to get out of it (unless the two of you are breaking up, of course). Basically, I’m just warning you that if you do move in with her, your life is going to change drastically. Heck, you might even see yourself getting a dog, or getting married, in the near future.
Okay, I’m done ranting. Let’s get into the details of what you should do before moving in with your lovely girlfriend.
Don’t move in with her to save money, move in with her because you love her.
Don’t move in with your girlfriend unless you really genuinely want to live with her. Genuinely wanting to live with her means you have to love her. Don’t just take the leap to save money on a bill or two each month. In other words, you must be entirely committed to a promising future with her.
In addition to this bit of advice, I’d like to inform you that moving in with your girlfriend is not just a decision you have to make; She has to make it, too. This, in turn, means that the two of you must be emotionally ready to take such a huge leap together. It’s not all fun and rainbows living with your girl; You’ll find chunks of hair in the sink, you’ll find tampon wrappers in the trash, and you’ll probably find old dishes in the sink from time to time (unless she’s a neat freak). So please, try to be prepared for all that may happen.
Talk your money issues out first.
Talk about money before moving in together, and talk about it a lot. Don’t just have one conversation and then jump off the couch to go check out apartments. Really sit down and budget the money you have and the money she has to make sure you’ll both be financially stable.
I’m only emphasizing this for your own good. A lot of couples go ahead with finding an apartment together and don’t realize how difficult and challenging it is until way later. In addition, make sure the two of you are willing to split the cost of bills evenly. If one person makes a little more than the other and that person wants to pay one more bill than the other each month, that’s fine. It’s fine as long as you both agree.
Please, I can’t stress this aspect out enough. If problems do arise regarding money, the relationship will most likely change, and you don’t want that to happen.
Get rid of everything that you don’t need.
You may be a hoarder or you may just have an emotional attachment to some of the things you own, but either way, you need to get rid of the stuff that doesn’t matter before you move in with your girl. This means any loose college papers or any old magazines. In addition, take all of your clothes out and lay them on your bed before packing. That means take everything in your drawers and everything in your closet out. Look at each piece and ask yourself if you really wear it or not (Tip: if you haven’t worn it in over 6 months, chances are you won’t wear it again). Get rid of all the stuff you don’t wear. Remember, you’re moving in with a girl, she’ll need more closet/drawer space than you will. And she won’t tolerate you taking more than a quarter of the room up.
They may have a weird collection or weird items they keep, don’t judge this.
Let me start this off with an example: I have a teddy bear named Brody that was given to me by my sister when I was 14-years-old. Okay, I know what you’re thinking, who gives their 14-year-old sister a teddy bear. Well, in her defense, it was a bear in the form of my high school mascot, and it was wearing a little jersey that represented my school, so I loved it. And I’ll never get rid of it, but it is a little weird for a 20-something-year-old to have a teddy bear, right?
My point here is to just accept her weird collection or item. You may think she needs to get rid of it because you’re getting rid of a bunch of stuff, but keep in mind that she may love it. Try your best to understand.
Be Aware: Just because you’re moving in together doesn’t mean you’ll have more sex.
I know what you’re thinking, “Why won’t there be more sex? We’re going to constantly be around each other, we’ll always be walking around naked, and we’ll be sleeping in the same bed every night.” Yes, all of this is correct. However, that’s unrealistic, and thinking that it’s going to happen all the time will just cause problems.
Lastly, expect little battles and arguments to happen more often, considering you’ll be in each other’s personal space more.
I don’t really have to explain this one to you, right?
Good luck in your move-in endeavors!
By Jenny Lyn